24 Funny Wine Quotes

Posted by Mischa Nagdimunov on

Over the last 300 years people have pontificated about wine. From famous artists and politicians to anonymous writings that capture the meaning of wine, here are some of the top funny wine quotes from as early as 1200 to current day. Salut!


ONE

“In victory, you deserve Champagne. In defeat you need it.”
― Napoleon Bonaparte

TWO

“Beer is made by men, wine by God.”
― Martin Luther, circa 1500s
 
THREE

“Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.”
― Anonymous

FOUR

“I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”
― W.C. Fields, circa 1930′s

FIVE

“It takes a lot of good beer to make great wine”
― Brian O’Donnell, Winemaker of Belle Pente, 2013

SIX

“Champagne is appropriate for breakfast, lunch or dinner.”
― Madeline Puckette, 2010

SEVEN

“Either give me more wine or leave me alone.”
― Rumi, circa 1200′s

EIGHT

“The discovery of a wine is of greater moment than the discovery of a constellation. The universe is too full of stars.”
― Benjamin Franklin, circa 1700s

NINE

“What wine goes with Captain Crunch?”
― George Carlin

TEN
 
“Life is too short to drink bad wine.”
― Anonymous

ELEVEN

“She gets to keep the chalet and the Rolls, I want the Montrachet.”
― Forbes Magazine, May 6, 1996

TWELVE

“My only regret in life is that I didn’t drink enough Champagne.”
― Robert Noecker

THIRTEEN

“Give me wine to wash me clean of the weather-stains of cares”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

FOURTEEN
 
I can certainly see that you know your wine. Most of the guests who stay here wouldn’t know the difference between Bordeaux and Claret.
― Basil Fawlty, “Fawlty Towers”

FIFTEEN

“Nothing makes the future look so rosy as to contemplate it through a glass of Chambertin.”
― Napoleon Bonaparte
 
SIXTEEN

“Age is just a number. It’s totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine.”
― Joan Collins

SEVENTEEN

“Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle.”
― Paulo Coelho

EIGHTEEN

“Men are like wine – some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.”
― Pope John XXIII

NINETEEN

“Penicillin cures, but wine makes people happy.”
― Alexander Fleming

TWENTY

“A gourmet meal without a glass of wine just seems tragic to me somehow.”
― Kathy Mattea

TWENTY ONE

“We all need something to help us unwind at the end of the day. You might have a glass of wine, or a joint, or a big delicious blob of heroin to silence your silly brainbox of its witterings but there has to be some form of punctuation, or life just seems utterly relentless.”
― Russell Brand, My Booky Wook

TWENTY TWO

“Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages.”
― Louis Pasteur

TWENTY THREE

“One should always be drunk. That’s all that matters…But with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you chose. But get drunk.”
― Charles Baudelaire, circa 1850s

TWENTY FOUR

“Anyone who tries to make you believe that he knows all about wines is obviously a fake.”
― Leon Adams

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